“Dear Hushpuppi” — An Open Letter From Onyeka Nwelue

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Dear Hushpuppi,

I’m an admirer of your pictures . I don’t envy you. I think I would love to meet you in person – and disappear. Maybe, that’s why I admire your tenacity to ‘pepper’ the haters and ‘humble’ them, but since they ‘humbled’.

the kidnapper Evans , I have been thinking about you . I didn’t say you are a kidnapper . Far from that. I am just worried about you.

Let’s take a spirituality class.

There is something called Wheel of Samsara in Hinduism . It rotates . It moves . It never stays in one place . It is like a table , which always turns . And within all of us , there is what we call willpower and the Cruel Mind . It’ s okay if you say I am saying rubbish, but let us watch between now and August and see what happens . What we want will always come to us , if we focus on them.
You have defeated poverty , but you spend a lot of energy dragging poverty along with you.

You feel bad leaving poverty . You feel vengeful. You feel you need to retaliate. That is why you have chosen to oppress us , most of us who may never really enjoy the kind of life that you are enjoying.

Money is addictive ; it is also an illusion . Everyone needs an addiction, everyone needs it . When we have it , it is like a magnet , it attracts everyone . You know when you hold a magnet , it attracts everything that it can attract . It grabs them, hold them. That ’ s what you have done.

I doubt there is any mind that has any positive vibes for you any more. We are tormented by your showcase of wealth . We may not say it , but we are not happy.

A very famous musician , William Onyeabor was laid to rest recently . Mr Onyeabor , before his death , dissociated himself from the proceeds of his music. He said he had made the music with finances and money from a Russian mafia and syndicate . He died a Born Again , but he didn ’t leave the house he built with that money . He died under the roof of that house.

The precious thing that Mr Onyeabor gave us is his music . I am sure you know one of his songs , ‘When the Going is Smooth and Good ’? Let me share some of the lyrics of that song with you here, quickly:

When The Going Is Smooth And Good

Many , Many People Will Be Your Friend

Oh , Yeah , Yeah , Yeah , Yeah!

When The Going Is Smooth And Good

Many , Many People Will Be Your Friend

But When The Going Becomes Tough

Many Of Your Friends Will Run Away

Dear Hushpuppi , I love that you have really worked smart and escaped poverty . I can tell you that poverty is a terrible thing . When you are poor , nobody wants to be your friend . If people are honest with themselves , we only want to enjoy with the rich, like you , even if it ’ s just a pie of your happiness . You are really living well , based on statistics from social media . The pictures are so colourful , but I for once , I don ’t envy you . I know why and I will tell you.

Most of the victims of Chukwudi Dumeme “Evans ” Onwuamadike are Igbo people . You know , they say the richest men in Nigeria are on the covers of Forbes magazine . I tell them, “No . ” If you want to find the richest men in Nigeria, take a walk to Alaba , Balogun, Yaba , Onitsha markets and you will find them.

I have briefly done business with these men . They are very secretive with their wealth . They do not like attention . Those of us who seek for attention for the penny we have, are not wise and because we are mostly attention whores , we seek for attention with anything . Also , what doubles it is that some of us who seek attention and validation from the populace come from poor homes. When a poor man begins to see little wealth , it gets into his head.

I like that you want to ‘ humble ’ people , but there is no competition in the pursuit of wealth. Wealth will come and go. We all know that and you sef , will get bored of ‘humbling ’ people some day and you will be ‘humbled . ’ But, please , shine ! It ’ s your turn to shine.

Dear Hushpuppi , I know you don ’ t print money , so I want to assume that you have a glowing business that brings in lots of money . Hopefully , just like William Onyeabor left his music behind for us to enjoy , you will learn to leave a legacy behind ; something that the next generations will talk about . It won’ t augur well if your story turns out to be something similar to Evans ’ . That won’ t be nice . So , be nice to us.

Torment us with pictures . I look forward to reading captions that have your name on it . I actually genuinely admire the fact that you can have such freedom and expressively show your wealth to the public and don ’ t expect any reprisal of any sort . If I had your kind of money , I would be scared showing it online , because I am certain that my phones will ring ceaselessly : those I owe money and those who need money will call and make requests . I don ’ t know how you handle this.

Also , I admire how you spend that sort of money in clubs with ‘friends . ’ Your friends , I must say , are terrible people . They never show that they are proud of you . If I were you , when I am with you in the club , I would post pictures and even tell the world that you are the Reigning King and that everyone should fear you . Your ‘ Champagne Friends ’ wouldn’ t do that , because the day you are going down , they are not going down with you . They are here for the drinks and the little cash.

They are going to say sweet things to you , but you are going to carry your cross alone.

Just because like you , I am an attention whore , I will end this letter now and hope to meet you someday.

Hugs,

Onyeka Nwelue